A three a.m. alarm call does nothing to settle the system, but I had at least managed a four hours reasonable sleep, avoiding the tossing and turning that I am usually prey to when I have a time for rising that is not my norm. Nor did the drive to airport do much to settle the system, as even at that time of the morning the roads are busy and the driving rather undisciplined.
This time I had remembered to print my boarding pass which smoothed entry into the airport past the armed guard, and guided by my chum from the Marriott was manoeuvred to the head of the check in queue, where the conversation with the check in agent I have already reported occurred;
He: "Dr H, I see you are flying economy"
Me: "Yes"
He: "Today we have some bargain business class upgrades"
Me: "Tell me more..how much?"
He: "In which currency?"
Me: "Sterling"
He: tap,tap
He: "990"
Me: "I said sterling, not rupees"
Well, I lied about the last line but I didn't take it.
Then up to the Plaza Premium lounge courtesy of Priority Pass where I gave in to a desire for two fried eggs but restrained myself from taking advantage of the bar. Had they had some fizz, maybe, but red wine was perhaps a little too heavy for that time of day. I must admit to casting some envious glances around at those who had the bearing of people who were headed for an “enhanced” flight class….
When boarding time rolled around, it was efficient and we were all seated and ready to go ten minutes early. Whilst passing through the enhanced cabins I wasn’t too taken by the layout, not least the WT+ two-four-two set up. Perhaps the seats are that bit wider, but being put in the central four would, I think, be less comfortable than the central three back in the cheap seats. At least the passenger in the middle of those can spread the botheration when they need to leave their seat. Of course, that’s not say that say I wouldn’t take one had a reasonably priced opportunity presented itself.
This time I had opted for an aisle seat on the port side three, which could have been a mistake but the father and daughter in the other two seats spent most of their time glued to the TV or asleep. As with the outbound, the flight was rammed in economy and when leaving the aircraft in London had clearly also been so in the forward cabins. Presumably somebody then had taken up the bargain offer at check in….
Once in the air we were switched into night flight mode (despite it being a day flight) and from that point on the experience was much the same as the outbound (though without the discomforts wrought by my forward and rear neighbours on that flight) and that experience was ….dull.
Food offerings were at best lacklustre and at worst stomach churningly inedible. Breakfast (vegetarian again the only option), a snack box and possibly the worst meal I’ve ever had on an aircraft. For lunch we were offered vegetarian or lamb. Now, I’ve had lamb before on a flight to Turkey and it was quite delicious. This BA offering seemed to have been boiled. To add insult to injury, lunch service was accompanied only by tea and coffee with the meal. Tea? With a meal? The last time I had that was at my grandma’s back in the late 1960’s. Clearly many in the cabin shared my opinion of the food as when venturing for a final freshen up prior to landing many of my steps landed on a discarded item of food.
On the upside, we were a good twenty minutes early into Heathrow which seemed to be a good omen. The only hitch in getting through the airport was the complete switching off of the e-gates just as they’d corralled as many passengers as possible into that queue. Luckily that was only a couple of minutes wait and the rest of the process to exiting the terminal was a breeze. The same could not be said for the trip back to East Anglia which took an hour and a half longer that it should have, but that’s hardly BA’s fault and did give me some time to sleep.
We can get better, because we're not dead yet
