This is a Trip Report from the Upper Class cabin
Ground Staff
Food & Drink
Entertainment
Seat
Cabin Crew
On my flight over from AMS, I toyed with the decision as to whether I would use Flight Connections or go landside for the journey. I was an early user of the ex-EU option from AMS some 4 or 5 years ago and on that occasion I had chosen to check my bags only as far as LHR, unsure that my bags would go into the UC bin and thus I had to collect and re-check. On this occasion, I really couldn’t be bothered to collect them and so they were re-checked as far as JNB - even though the BA agent at the desk looked at me rather snootily as I wasn’t using BA for the full journey. Sorry darling, this way was cheaper on VS. However it meant that both options were available to me.
On my last transits through LHR, I had used Flight Connections and so, on a whim I decided to take the landside option. Having exited with ease through Immigration, I headed for the HEX to find that a train was due to leave within minutes to T3. In no time at all I was deposited at the stop for that terminal and as the route to T3 was as familiar to me as a stroll through my local park, I was soon outside T3. The whole journey was probably quicker than the trundle around the caverns of LHR on the bus. The first thing that struck me when looking at Zone A was the dominance of Delta as opposed to VS on the signage on the outside of the zone. However the interior was reassuring familiar with the UC area bathed in purple lighting. I fetched up at the desk, presented my BA boarding pass and asked for a “proper one”. The check-in lady laughed and acceded to my request, printed a VS boarding card, confirmed that my bags had arrived in T3 and asked if I knew the way to the Clubhouse. I assured her that I did and headed for the lift. Once in the private security wing, there had been some changes - the point of loading items for screening was at the point of where the guy used to look at your boarding pass. That was no harm as on my last sojourn through the security wing the queue had been 20+ deep. However, on this occasion I was the only one there and was through in two shakes of a (honey) lamb’s tail and, having dodged the perfume sprayers, was quickly at the foot of the marble staircase. I stopped and breathed a sigh of contentment. It was like a home-coming. At the top, I was welcomed and, once I had assured the lady at the door that I had been to the CH before, I entered, deposited my coat etc., and headed off for the Spa where an appointment was made for two hours hence.
The CH was relatively quiet at this stage and I found a seat in the bank of seats facing the bar. Within seconds a staff member was at my side and a Virgin Redhead was in my possession (with thanks to buns for introducing me to this a couple of years ago) and after some deliberation some chicken wings and chips were placed before me. They were gorgeous and really hit the spot. This was all I had expected from the CH and beyond! Gone was the Cloak of Invisibility which had dogged me on previous visits (hopefully it was still in the Concorde Room in T5 whence it had followed me). Gone was the indifference I had suffered in the Concorde Room. The treatment was as good as I had come to expect. The Redheads were replenished regularly to the extent that at one stage, it was necessary to ask for water to dilute the alcohol intake! I moved temporarily to the area behind the bar to use the charging points and for a brief time the ghost of the Cloak of Invisibility descended. The CH had become quite busy by then but the call for a JFK flight and one other was made and that reduced the numbers and so I returned to the area I had been in and placed my iPhone and iPad to charge at the nearest point to where I was sitting and accepted another Redhead. At some point someone sat in the area where the devices were being charged and ordered food. No problem as I was prepared to wait until he or I left. Unfortunately my phone rang and as I went to retrieve it with an apology, I was treated to a DYKWIA glare. I’m sorry! I hadn’t expected this but really your phone was more likely to ring than mine given that out of my country and hadn’t expected to ring and really I don’t get that many cold calls. In fairness, it was an essential one - where was the key to X kept (given that it’s only looked for about 3 times a year!) I apologised profusely but yer man was a complete DYKWIA and was totally ungracious to the extent that I disconnected my iPhone and iPad even though they could have done with a bit longer charge. He departed for the DXB flight and although I reconnected everything the reality was that my flight was called shortly afterwards so there was little benefit. Oh, yes, I nearly forgot - at one stage a young man bound also for the DXB flight sat in the seat beside me and engaged in a short conversation before his flight was called. All in all, the CH experience was excellent - the best I had had in a long time.
I left the CH just before the second call and made my way to the Gate which was something like 14 or 16. Again, a few changes here as they were working on the corridor which links the main departure area with the gate area so no moving walkways. My poor old feet! The gate area was empty so it was straight through and straight on to the plane which was G-VCRU. I must confess at this stage I was quite excited as I boarded the 787 for the first time and made my way to my seat at 4A. First impressions were good. No long dormitory of UC suites which I hated in the A346. The cabin was much shorter and certainly looked less crowded. The mood lighting was lovely and the suites looked good. The overhead bins were really spacious to the extent that I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to retrieve my stuff when the time came. However I consoled myself with the fact that I have mastered my “helpless little old lady” look and usually there is some knight in shining armour who falls for it! So far so good.
Within minutes of my arrival at my suite, the cabin crew was beside me offering a pre-flight drink and of course, I requested champagne and a sleep suit. Both were delivered to me and I headed to the washrooms to change only to find that the one near the L2 door was out of order. The one on the opposite side was also occupied so there was no alternative but to use the one on the other side of the curtain in the PE cabin. Long-term members of this site will remember how at times, UC passengers complained about PE passengers using the UC washrooms depending on the aircraft configurations. Well now it was payback time as UC passengers needed to go through the curtain to the washrooms in PE. That was fine as far as I was concerned so long as I wasn’t inconveniencing any PE passenger but I learned that the washrooms on that particular aircraft had been out of commission for the past week! And this was the newest aircraft in the fleet!!
On my way back to my seat I realised I hadn’t really noticed the bar and had a good look. I wasn’t particularly impressed by it as I felt it looked like a table that had been set up at a church bazaar with a few stools in front of it. I much preferred the old wrap-around bar which looked like something out of a pub and therefore more bar-like! But then I’m old and this was new and trendy, so what do I know? And as it was an overnight flight it was unlikely I would be using it.
At my seat, the champagne was waiting. I honestly don’t know what kind it was - I blame the Redheads - nor can I remember the shelf on which it was perched. Well it was two months ago!
It wasn’t long after that that the ground staff were requested to leave the aircraft, the doors were closed and we trundled our way to the runway while I quaffed the rest of my champagne. The safety video was shown, which was new since my last flight although I had seen it online. To be honest, it didn’t really grab my attention in the way that the previous videos (and those of other airlines including the more functional and straightforward to the point of being boring ones) did and it really was too gimmicky.
Once on board the cabin crew came round looking for our drinks round and to take our dinner orders. Within minutes I was in possession of a G&T and crisps but there was no offer to refresh the drink. For dinner I chose the potato and leek soup which fitted mdvipond’s description of warm and gloopy to perfection. That was followed by a fillet steak with rosti potatoes, roasted red onions and carrot puree. It was gorgeous and washed down with a red wine which I think was a Malbec. I followed it with a white and dark chocolate cheesecake with a black cherry foam which was to die for (but alas left no room for the cheese and biccies) It was an excellent meal and beat most of the others that I had had on other airlines into a cocked hat (well maybe not the tasting menu in BA First to JNB, and the transatlantic meals on EI) but it was up there with the best.
Oh, at this stage, I have made no mention of the IFE. That’s because there was nothing on it which grabbed my attention. I much prefer to use my iPad and generally just turn on the map. To be quite honest, I didn’t like it - the map, I mean. OK it gave the specifics of times, altitudes and speed but the graphics gave no indication as to where exactly you were in the world. Going to South Africa one flies over great swathes of land much of it which will be uninhabited - or else not showing on a conventional map. I really needed to see a world map which showed me roughly where I was on the continent of Africa and other things beside which are shown on most airlines in-flight maps. This was too sophisticated for me!
Once the meal was over, I converted my bed, cuddled up for the night and slept like the proverbial baby. Incidentally, I personally never adjust the window blinds. I like to look out in daytime and in nighttime - well it’s dark, isn’t it? However, it wasn’t an issue this time round as the crew closed or opened the shades as they saw fit electronically (although I am aware that I could do this myself if I chose to). The minute I was awake the cabin crew was at my side asking if there was anything I needed and soon I was in possession of orange juice and a coffee which I later followed up with cornflakes and fruit. A cooked breakfast was on offer but I really wasn’t interested in it. I changed before the rest of the cabin woke up and before the queue to the washrooms grew too long, bearing in mind the out of order one. The cabin was prepared for landing and a male cabin crew, whom I had not seen before came round with the basket of love hearts. I took one and he continued on his way, only to re-appear a minute later, saying, “Go on! Take some more! No-one else wants them!” I laughed and acquiesced, thinking that those are the touches I love about VS.
Shortly after that, we began our descent into JNB where most of the early morning flights from the UK, Europe and the Middle East had landed. I rather think that we were behind the tail end of a flight in the immigration hall but the formalities were quick. My bag, even though it had come from AMS, was one of the first through and, having passed through Customs I was quick to check in for my SAA flight to Durban before heading off to the domestic terminal.
One of the difficulties in JNB is that, exiting into the main terminal you are besieged with offers of help, some official and some not. For the most part they were happy just to point me in the way of the domestic terminal especially when I said I knew my way. However, there always seems to be one person who will insist on trying to show you the way even though you say you know it and then proceed to ignore him. In these instances, security is a welcome release especially when yer man starts to demand “a teep for food” I’m sure they are an embarrassment to the JNB authorities.
Security was easy to the point of laxness. I don’t think they even looked at the x-ray of my bags. I didn’t have lounge access for this leg but by the time I had caught up with all that was happening in my cyberspace, it was time to board. My SAA flight to Durban was bog standard (but minus the G&T) and at this stage I can’t remember what I had. SAA serves a snack and a beverage (which includes wines and beers) without charge. The flight is not dissimilar to my ORK-LHR trips and soon we were in King Shaka airport where I was welcomed by my brother - no heart-stopping arrivals this time!!!
OK, so it was back to VS after two years. So what was it like considering that my last two trips to JNB had been on other airlines and it was my first trip on a 787?
I must admit it was with some apprehension I set off for this flight. I had had so many different experiences in the last two years plus my status had dropped from Gold to lowly Red and thus to the bottom of the pecking order just above those who were not FC members. At check-in, it was as if I never had left even though all I was looking for was a VS boarding card, having come from AMS. The CH was the best for a long time even when I was Gold. On board, I wasn’t sure. The friendliness was there but there wasn’t the same engagement I had come to expect. Still they were the best compared with the crews on the other carriers.
Oh and the 787. I loved it! I loved the way the UC cabin was shorter than the A346 and so looked less like a dormitory. I had a problem in releasing the table but when I got the hang of it, it was fine. The IFE screen was sharper than the others I had seen but I wasn’t enamoured of the iMap. I liked the fact that the UC and PE toilets were side by side even though one of the UC toilets was out of order and we had to pop through the curtain from time to time. In a perfect world there was enough for each cabin. Best of all, the air quality! Apart from the fact that the cabins did not overheat, usually at the end of such a long flight my sinuses etc. dry up horribly to the extent that I want to pick my nose!! No such feeling this time! Hallelujah!