V-Flyer

So. Ryanair.

The airline I love to hate. And hate to love.

Ryanair, when things are going well, are fine. Good. Excellent even. And on my recent day trip to Dubln, they were excellent. I hate saying that. Out of snobbery, nothing more. There were some downsides...

My flight cost 2.42, 2.40 of that being a debit card charge. This is now 8, but since I booked in June I paid a lower rate.

Check-in online opens two weeks prior to departure, and of course, I checked in two weeks prior to departure. Not that it matters a jot, Ryanair do priority boarding and then scrum (more of that later). I refused to pay for priority boarding. When you are paying 0.02 return for a flight, 6.00 each way for priority seems like a rip off.

So, checked in, I arrive at Gatwick at 8.00am, for my 10.00am departure. The queue for security is long, and two passengers for a Jamaica flight are arguing with airport staff as their carry on baggage doesn't fit in the metal frame. The idea of transferring some of the contents to the 2nd passenger who doesn't have any carry on luggage occurs to them only after 20 minutes wasted arguing. (As I was in the queue behind them I was privy to this).
All my items are placed in the plastic tray, my belt, my coat etc. Then, through the arch and after collecting my items I am asked to remove my trainers. (There may be a B-O-M-B in them, but don't say the word out loud). Getting through security takes about 20 minutes.

South Terminal has the usual shops etc. and we go to Frankie & Jonnies for breakfast. Urgh. At least you can look out the window at the plane, butthis place is lack lustre. But kudos to the waiter who realised that we were in a hurry so did everything faster.

The display boards at Gatwick show the 1000 depature 'delayed to 1000', and after a while of thinking that this means that an update will be, er, displayed at 1000, I go back and check again. This time, the display says 'delayed to 0924'. At 0924hrs, you can guess that this causes a bit of panic. I go to the enquiry desk, and queue. As I am about to be served, a lady barges in front of me. 'Excuse ME!' I declare. 'There is a QUEUE!' In my head, I really want to place my hands on my hips, but I resist.

She explains that she needs to find out about the 1000 departure to Dublin, and uses this as an excuse for jumping the queue. I am unimpressed and try to talk to the enquiry desk, with the lady muttering behind me. There's no delay! Go to Gate 14. The flight is on time.
Is there a word for that weird mixture of relief that the flight is on time, combined with, Oh Shit! We're late for it! ? Add to that my gripe about that woman. So rude. She even approaches me later, not to apologise, but to berate me because, her pushing past me in the queue was OK because it was about the same flight. Sadly I don't have a biting comment to make, I just roll my eyes at her, hoping that this will have the same effect on her as rolling my eyes at my mum did.

Gate 14 is nice and close, so we get there easily. Perhaps because of the malfunctioning screens, it is quiet, and I see no evidence of scrum. Boarding is quick and easy, and my nervous flyer delights at the Ryanair onboard music.

Now. An admission. I sort of like the Ryanair music. There's something about it that says Holiday. You can hear it here, but the Ryanair version doesn't include words. Except when they are annoucing that you can download it... and play it loud for 20 seconds over Bristol! http://www.mrsuperfly.com/

Ryanair do the sales pitch, scratchcards, Mr Superfly, drinks, duty free, and their own version of the Innovations catalogue, and then we land. Ryanair play a fanfare to announce their ontime arrival, my nervous flyer finds this hilarious. Given that they've scheduled 75 minutes for a 50 minute flight, arriving on time is pretty easy. However for my nervous flyer, this extra ridiculous music means his fear of flying is, more or less, gone.

Dublin Airport is in the middle of a transformation, and is really rather nice. Having no luggage we are out of there in no time, and buy our tickets for the bus to the city centre. (Last time I flew into Dublin, it took forever and went through several leafy suburbs. This time it's motorway - tunnel - Docklands - city. In about 1/2 hour. )

My 5th Ryanair flight this year, yet again, cheap and hassle free.

God I hate O' Leary!

quote: Dublin Airport is in the middle of a transformation, and is really rather nice.
Rather nice? Are you sure it's Dublin you flew into?

Well, Area, Pier, Wing or whatever they call it 'D' anyway...

Ah yes, the one where they say that D is for Dundalk as you nearly have to walk to that town to reach it.

And don't forget I am comparing it to Gatwick!!