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VS006 MIA-LHR 23 Apr 07 (Upper)

PostPosted: 26 Apr 2007, 23:55
by nibbs
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So having spent a week in the Caribbean followed by 24 hours of Miami shopping, we were ready for our return back to the UK. We had stayed at the hotel within the airport the previous night and had left our cases in left luggage in the morning to make the full use of our last day.

Theres no doubt that the hotel is excellent for convenience (you literally fall out of the lift (sorry, elevator!) and the VS check in is right in front of you). That said, for $190 I was expecting more for my money. Our room looked very tired and the bathroom dated. I read on Tripadviser that some floors have been refurbished guess ours wasnt one of them.

We dropped off the hire car, collected the cases and was at the back of around a ten person UC queue with three hours until the flight. A family of four were at the front, screaming kids and all, and another family of four arrived just after us with the biggest trolley of suitcases I have ever seen. Must have had nearly ten cases between them and I thought we travelled with too much!

PE queue had just emptied as the family arrived and their porter went straight to the PE desk didnt think too much of it at until we saw the UC labels being attached. Much grumbling and evil looks from those in the UC queue.

Checked in by a really polite guy, who handed over the lounge pass and boarding cards. Taking our green cards he quipped that he needed to pass them to George so that he didnt come looking for us!

The lounge at Miami has been well documented in previous trip reports so I wont go into detail. However, we did establish that if you asked at the reception desk they would prepare a mini baguette sandwich for you which was fairly basic but filled a gap.

The lounge was already half full when we arrived and we took up a corner, happy to be away from the masses outside. Then it all started to go nasty.

A group of five couples arrived shortly after us, all of which must have been in their late 20s or early 30s. From the loud conversation (bordering on shouting at times) it appeared that they had had a long weekend away, drunk plenty, and continued to do so at the airport. The language was bad with the F and C words in regular use.

The parents of the two families politely asked them to watch their language as there was young children in the lounge, which had the desired effect for at least a couple of minutes before starting over. As time passed, it was clear that one couple in particular was not only the loudest and obscene but also the most hammered. Most of the group decided to make their way through security early, leaving this couple behind we reckon that they had spotted how bad they were and decided to get through security ahead of them.

We followed, mainly to avoid the noise, both of us getting selected to go through the explosives detector. Now I must have seen dozens of people going though and each time the waiting period before the doors opened and the green light come on was the same. When it was my turn, it must have taken twice, maybe three times as long talk about panic beginning to set in!

We arrived at the gate with an hour to go and boarding was just about to start. A couple of wheelchairs went first, followed swiftly by priority boarding. As we walked past the desk, we spotted our alcoholic friends who had not only made it through security, but were now obviously very drunk and heading our way.

On board, we took our seats 8A and 9A and was made very welcome by the crew and the IFBT who having heard that Tracy did not receive a treatment on the way out put her at the top of her list (and was true to her word as soon as the seat belt sign was off, Tracy got her back and shoulder massage). It was the same plane that we had taken on the way out due to the damage to 11A (thanks to honey lamb, I now know that it was G-VWEB, Surfer Girl thanks honey lamb!).

Champagne was the order of the day, which we received as the families and large group arrived on board together. Tracy and I exchanged nervous glances pondering whether it would be the screaming kids or the alcoholics sat next to us..it was the kids. However, I have to say that once on board, they were good as gold (with one exception as youll see below!) and they were a pleasure to fly with.

Meanwhile, back with the loud couple, Im not sure at what point the crew decide that someone is not fit to fly, but they must have really been pushing the line. He kept making a big deal about how he could afford to do this every day of the week, whilst she kept complaining that it was taking too long for dinner to be served and this was before theyd even closed the cabin door! Within five minutes, two complaints that we saw had been made. If the crew spoke to the couple, we missed it, but thankfully during taxi they both fell asleep to the relief of all those sat around them.

We took off within five minutes of advertised time for a really smooth ride across the pond. I can only remember the seat belt lights coming on once, but even that was just for a couple of minutes. UC had one empty suite, with a total of 299 on board.

Come dinner time, the crew came around to lay the tables as usual. Unlike my outward experience with the tray table button (see my other report!), this time, although the table popped out, it wouldnt go up. First, a female flight attendant had a go, then a male attendant came over with a knife and started levering it out with no success, then the supervisor came over and at one point there were three of them all having a go with me sat there avoiding my toes being sliced off by the knife wielding attendant!!

Having decided it was never going to come out (at least, not without welding equipment or a lump hammer), I decided to eat with Tracy at her table rather than at the spare suite down the front of the plane.which was an interesting experience! Not sure how many of you have tried it, but unless youre the size of two kids, its fair to say that there aint enough room! I had to sit 45 degrees to Tracy to avoid her legs, meanwhile my elbow kept hitting the bed / seat transform button every time I cut my steak funny the first time, not so after the tenth!

After the carrot and ginger soup (excellent) and the steak and garlic mash (not bad but very filling) Tracy kicked me out to have dessert back in my own suite. Apple pie and cream was the order of the day and very nice.

Comedy moment of the flight soon followed. The four year old in the suite next to me was getting ready for bed, his Dad converting the seat for him. You could tell that little Billy was really impressed by the look on his face. Having worked out which button his Dad was pressing, he promptly walked over to my suite and started to make mine into a bed with me still sat in it! Dad, still busy making the bed, must of wondered why the bloke next door was throwing his wine about with one hand, trying to get his seat belt off with the other whilst his son stood there all innocent as if he was just leaning on the edge of the suite!

No harm was done and much laughter was had by all around!

Tracy managed to get five hours sleep, I managed about three (too busy watching Pirates of the Caribbean 2). By this stage they must have turned the heat up because it was like a furnace on board. With my ninja suit and the duvet, it was like we were still in Miami.

We were woken up with an hour to go breakfast was spot on what we had asked for the night before and following the rush to the toilets, the seat belt lights were on. At this point I couldnt help but smile when two people across the cabin were obviously suffering with the mother of all hangovers funnily enough, they had gone very quiet[:$]. Twenty five minutes later we had a safe landing into a damp and cloudy LHR.

Following a long walk from the gate, and a short passport queue, we were in baggage reclaim. Our cases were first, sixth and eighth off, a new record for us the first coming out as we arrived in baggage reclaim. I didnt time it but it couldnt have been more than 15 minutes from seat to arrivals lounge.

Another great flight, although sadly spoiled pre-flight. Our last in UC for a while (unless the lottery comes up on Saturday of course!).

Apologies for the monster report that this has turned into but I hoped you enjoyed it!

Cheers,

Neil


PS: Think I might have been a bit generous with the seat ratings on the left!

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 00:09
by Darren Wheeler
Thanks nibbs. Another brilliant TR and very enjoyable.

It just goes to show that money is no sign of class. Normally US airports are really hard on those causing a disturbance through drink. Probably glad to be shot of them.

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 00:19
by Scrooge
Well at least the idiots stayed asleep.

Sounds like a better flight all around than the one out.I have to agree about the eating with the other half..unless you are the size of LRoM and LSoM there is no way a couple can do it.

Just out of interest which ship were you on for your cruise?

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 00:23
by nibbs
Originally posted by Scrooge

Just out of interest which ship were you on for your cruise?


Carnival Legend out of Tampa - great ship, great crew, great weather!

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 00:23
by honey lamb
Apologies for the monster report that this has turned into but I hoped you enjoyed it!

Please don't apologise. It was great and I'm of the 'more detail the better' school. I just love 'em [y]

I'm surprised that the drunken pair were allowed to fly. People have been tossed off flights for far less obvious drunkenness. Thank goodness they fell asleep/passed out. The whole episode must have been very unpleasant

(thanks to honey lamb, I now know that it was G-VWEB, Surfer Girl Ð thanks honey lamb!).

You're welcome [:X]

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 00:41
by mike-smashing
You can eat facing another grown adult - my 6' 2' friend Paul included - in the suite on the 744. The person in the 'real' seat just has to make sure their seat is upright rather than reclined into the slouch position.

It's more likely the 'battery hen' config on the 340 which is the problem here.

Even I've nearly tried to 'squash' travelling companions in the UCS before now, like something out of a cartoon!

Great to hear that the crew, especially the IFBT, were on form here. The crew can really make or break the flight, as we've said so many times.

Excellent news to hear that the drunks had passed out early on in the flight. That they suffered for it later is just karmic.

Thanks for the report!

Mike

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 01:32
by jilly
Neil don't apologise that was a really good read - the thought of you trying to get out of your seat whilst it was being turned into a bed was great!

When we flew back from Miami last year I too told the IFBT that I didn't get a treatment on the way out and she duly obliged.

No doubt the drunks had the mother of all hangovers that lasted the rest of the day but I too am surprised that they were allowed on board.

Jilly

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 07:24
by n/a
Originally posted by Scrooge
unless you are the size of LRoM and LSoM there is no way a couple can do it.


Their Graces are of the most perfect proportions, much like the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, but with far fewer pugs.

Nice TR. Thank you!

GJ

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 08:40
by Scrooge
Originally posted by nibbs
Originally posted by Scrooge

Just out of interest which ship were you on for your cruise?


Carnival Legend out of Tampa - great ship, great crew, great weather!


It is a nice ship, we had an issue with our cabin on it, but the dining room team could arguably be the best we have had on land or sea.

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 08:54
by Mavrick
Neil thank you for another excellent TR, I really enjoyed the read thank you. [y] [:)]

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 13:11
by HighFlyer
Lovely TR Neil, and nice and detailed as most of us like them. I'm glad you had a good flight!

Not sure how many of you have tried it, but unless you're the size of two kids, its fair to say that there ain't enough room!


Uhm, if you are the size of two kids, its superb!

Thanks,
Sarah

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 15:16
by n/a
Originally posted by HighFlyer
Uhm, if you are the size of two kids, its superb!


Awwwwww!!!! [:D] This is right out of Hello! (but, thankfully, that annoying Hurley woman is nowhere to be seen).

GJ

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 15:16
by pjh
Neil

Thanks for both the TR's. A great read - lots of detail about the flight services and observation about the flight experience - and another vicarious UC experience for yours truly.

Paul

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 18:22
by thejohn
i really enjoyed your tr a good read!!!![:)]

PostPosted: 27 Apr 2007, 21:49
by nibbs
Originally posted by HighFlyer
Lovely TR Neil, and nice and detailed as most of us like them. I'm glad you had a good flight!

Not sure how many of you have tried it, but unless you're the size of two kids, its fair to say that there ain't enough room!


Uhm, if you are the size of two kids, its superb!

Thanks,
Sarah


...you even got a basket of bread!

PostPosted: 28 Apr 2007, 19:01
by MrsG
Great TR Nibbs, thanks[y]

Having experienced MIA for the first time last week, it has to be one of the worst airports I've ever been in[xx(] Glad the drunks didn't spoil your flight.

PostPosted: 29 Apr 2007, 10:04
by buns
Nibbs

Thanks for a very entertainingTR, full of useful detail[y][y]

you must have been in that 'why does the weirdo always have to sit next to me' frame of mind when at the Lounge at MIA.

Really glad to see that the potentail distractions did not materialise[;)]

thanks once again for a riveting read

buns

PostPosted: 29 Apr 2007, 12:49
by DMetters-Bone
A very entertaining TR, thank you! Thank god the drunks fell alsleep straight away, could of been a bad flight......[n]

DMB