V-Flyer

Apologies for the delay in this report - Mrs D and I have both come back with an unpleasant illness which we're hoping is just food poisoning so we've been a bit listless.

After a fantastic week at the Serena Mombasa Beach Hotel, Mrs D and I had headed back to Nairobi for an overnight at the Hilton. The problem is that the VS flight leaves at 08:15 and you can't get a connecting flight from Mombasa early enough so if you want to holiday in Mombasa you WILL spend the night in Nairobi on the way back.

The taxi driver on the way to the Hilton offered to pick us up in the morning so we took his number. We confirmed this in the evening and the next morning we waited for him to show, At 05:46 he was officially late. A brief call revealed that he'd be with us before 06:05. To be safe we explained that if he wasn't present by 06:10 we'd be outta here. Needless to say we were outta here.

On the way to the airport we were slowed down by traffic jams caused by police road blocks. There has been much death and mayhem in Nairobi in the past week or so with the police attacking and killing the Mungiki. In addition bad rains at the weekend caused the collapse of a wall onto some slums with an attendant 40 deaths. However we still made the airport with about 90 minutes to go before our flight. Interestingly a colleague mailed me the next day checking I'd arrived home safely as 2 hours after we left the Hilton a bomb went off outside it with 1 death and 30 injured. Apparently the bomber is alleged to have been on his way to the airport.

Arrival at the airport was painless - locals rushed forward to help us unload and transfer - pushier than Red Caps but a lot cheaper. Baggage through the first XRay machine and the walk through detector - no problems. Baggage back onto a trolley and stopped for a random security check. Over to a table manned by two personnel who quickly and efficiently went through the bags looking for contrabrand. Upon completing the search (with much banter all the while) we were asked to sign a sheet indicating that we'd been searched. I explained that regretfully I couldn't as the three bars of gold bullion I had had in my luggage were now missing. Well it amused me and fortunately them and they started playing along with the joke. After signing it was over to the UC checkin were, seeing we were waiting, the person on the PE checkin waved us over to check us in. Our total baggage weight was 59.5Kg so I didn't have to explain the additional 10Kg each per Au holder - possibly just as well. Again the '30 minutes until checkin' stickers were affixed to our hand luggage. We opted against protest in favour of the easier 'remove later' option. Our BPs were annotated with something along the lines of 'Accepted for entry' and we went through security (straightforward) into the main terminal.

NBO isn't the most attractive airport - it basically looks like a corridor of duty free and other stores interrupted by plastic seating for gates. Smoking was however permitted at gate 12 much to Mrs D's pleasure. Virgin share use of the 'First Class' Lounge - hence I'm guessing the boarding card annotation instead of a Club House invite. The First Class Lounge is possibly the worst attempt at a Club House we'd ever experienced. But then we've never flown out of MAN [;)]. The entry is framed by a large board listing the plethora of eligible airlines - nothing like feeling exclusive - and a life size Masai warrior model. I actually had to double take to establish that it was a model. The door dragon (who actually was neither - there being no door and her countenance positively non-dragon like) welcomed us into the lounge and we sought out seats. The lounge layout is basically that of the shared lounge in Brussels (For those of you watching in black and white, the pink is behind the green - Ted Lowe; BBC Snooker Commentary circa 1980) - a long featureless room with groups of low chairs and tables on the left and at the far end on the right. The food and drink available is against the right wall. Total width of room probably about 12-14 ft, total length about 75ft. At the far end are the toilets. These do have running water but nothing comes out of the solitary hot tap. The sink surround is dirty but thw WCs are spotless as is the urinal. The hand dryer operates for 10 seconds before turning off - annoying if you actually want to wash you hands and dry them.

There was a tiny selection of reading materials and the usual selection of drinks - although diet drinks were not in evidence. The food consisted of small finger sandwiches wrapped tightly in cling film and a few pastries. A bowl of fruit completed the repast. The sandwiches were the usual culprits, ham and cheese, beef chicken etc and the cling film contrived to protect their incredible staleness magnificently. Fortunately we expected to eat on the plane so we just ate enough to take the edge off our hunger - breakfast not starting at the Hilton until 06:30.

With no announcements we made our way to the gate and regretfully it has to be said that the ground staff are still showing signs of being newbies [:)]. We walked to the priority boarding sign and were immediately seen by a member of ground staff who checked our details and then indicated to Mrs D that she should join the back of the queue of other 'checked' people. As the queue was only three people Mrs D complied but I remonstrated with the gentleman that the instruction should have been 'go to the front of the queue' not the back or otherwise it made a mockery of priority boarding. A hovering supervisor saw this and stepped in an apologised and agreed. Through this check it was to another x-ray machine and detector arch. Around the corner to ANOTHER x-ray machine and detector arch! So that's three sets before we get into the waiting area. Mind you if people are setting off bombs it's probably a good thing.

We then walked to the other side of the waiting area and sat down by the airbridge entrance. Boarding time came and went with nothing happening. Then an officious looking person came out of the airbridge and said to the person guarding it that she wanted to board NOW and that she was going to invite parents with babies to board first. There was a slight altercation but she overrode the complaint and collected together the parents and children and marched them down the airbridge. She then walked back out and started shouting boarding instructions - no tannoy announcement, so we're unsure if she suggested priority boarding.

We hotfooted down the airbridge for our final check and settled into our seats, 4 and 5K. The configuration had changed from a 346 to a 343 - GVSEA - so Odyssey. The seats had the new tables but lacked the perspex button protectors. Mrs D requested sleep suits and went to the forward bathroom to ninja up. Upon return she mentioned that the front toilet hadn't been cleaned properly. The FA immediately rushed forward to check this out and sort it. This was a good start - indicating a well run ship.

The preflight announcement was made and for once it was perfect - including the advice to set flight safe mode. When the FSM dropped by Francesca also mentioned that in addition to the toilets there was a dirty glass left in the suite from the previous flight. The FSM was horrified and moved to rectify it. Suddenly realisation dawned as the name tag swung into view - it was SouthernBelle - oh frabjous day! SouthernBelle as well as being a long time contributor to this board who is known for her balanced fairness has also gained a reputation with several board members as being an 'Alpha FSM'. Immediately we knew we were in for an excellent flight! Mutual introductions were made and she promised to return later to talk more.

The IFBT dropped by and this time because the loads were heavier in J (15 people as opposed to 8 on the way out) warned us that we might not be able to be seen. Throwing caution to the wind I requested a back massage again - hoping that others would either be asleep OR not request a treatment. Mrs D opted for the same. Y loads were VERY light, 39 people and W had around 7 pax.

Take off was 50 minutes late and when we did start to take off it was one of the longest runs down the runway I can remember. Just as I started to wonder if we were driving home we rotated. It seems that despite the light loads cargo is going very successfully on this route!

Once again we were presented with a new menu - it might be that this is not going to roll out across the fleet as it has some Kenyan specific items. Without further ado I'm pleased to present - ta da! The new return menu.

Breakfast
Selection of breakfast cereals - Cornflakes, Weetabix, Fruit 'n' Fibre, Special K
Toast served with honey and a selection of preserves - marmalade, strawberry & blackcurrant jams
Butter croissants served with a selection of preserves - marmalade, strawberry & blackcurrant jams
Cherry Danish pastry
Seasonal fresh fruit served with natural yoghurt
Bacon roll served with either tomato ketchup or brown sauce
Vol-au-vent filled with scrambled egg and smoked salmon served with chicken sausage, mushrooms, grilled tomato and irio Kenyan potato cake

Lunch
Starters
Smoked salmon and cream cheese roulade with capers, cucumber, olives and tomato
Leek and potato soup served with a choice of warm breads
Grilled honey-glazed sesame chicken served with ribbon noodles and tomato chutney dressing

Main courses
Roast chicken breast served with mashed potato, broccoli, carrots, courgettes and rosemary gravy
Grilled Kenyan tilapia, salmon and prawns with lemon and herbs served with baby new potatoes, cherry tomatoes and seasonal Kenyan vegetables
Vegetable briyani (sic) served with crispy friend onions & fresh coriander

Cheese
Kenyan mild cheddar
Brie
Kenyan soft blue cheese

Dessert
Sour cherry gateau served with mango coulis
Strawberry & Vanilla ice cream served with fresh strawberries.

I had the fruit and yoghurt, followed by the vol-au-vent. In honesty whilst this was tasty it would have benefitted from the filling being added to the casing just before serving rather than being heated in the casing as the casing became soggy. For lunch I had the roulade followed by the tilapia (quite nice) then the cheese. I enjoyed it all but the pedant in me wants to take issue with the word 'roulade'. To me this implies a rolled dish - a spiral of smoked salmon and cream cheese - not an individual cream cheese wrapped in smoked salmon.

Once again I was lucky enough to get the back massage (as was Mrs D) and shortly thereafter I was at the bar with a group of staff and was able to spread the V-Flyer gospel. The crew were fantastic although a little bored. At one stage a number of us stood around the bar playing amusing mind reading party games. The IFBT was part of the new intake and her enthusiasm was impressive. She positively stalked her clientele and complained that not enough people were available for treatments. Her view was that this was the job she'd trained for and she wanted to do it! Towards the end of the flight she was so desperate for work that she kindly offered me a second treatment - well - it'd be rude not to - so I had a manicure!

At all stages there was none of the hiding in the galley so evident on some flights, SouthernBelle's constant presence in the cabin being a beacon of encouragement to the others who were all clearly enjoying the flight.

All too soon we were landing - a little later than scheduled - and taken to the gate. We were first off the plane and in immigration within minutes - no mega trek. The queues in immigration were frightening but no queues for IRIS so within seconds we were through and down to carousel 10 for baggage collection. I was first there - Mrs D was following on - and the second person to the gate was a Virgin Director I recognised from a previous function. I greeted him and we were chatting when Mrs D arrived.

Our baggage was first on the conveyor and we were out of the airport within about 30 minutes of landing. All in all a FANTASTIC flight made - as ever - by a fantastic crew.

Decker

Yet another riveting read - thanks for the TR.

The sitiation you both left in NBO brings home the reason for strict airline security - mercifully you have arived back safe (if not well).

The First Class Lounge is possibly the worst attempt at a Club House we'd ever experienced. But then we've never flown out of MAN .

What about LAS[}:)][}:)]

Fantastic to hear the crew on your return keep up the score of 'good' Vs 'could do better' and hopefully this will help return your faith in what VS can offer when they put their mind to it.

hope you both get better soon

buns

GREAT Trip Report - Glad you got back safely...and experienced VS on a 'good day' to boot! [:D]

Great Report, thanks for your views on NBO also. IFBT sounds fantastic!

great tr hope you are both well soon

Brilliant TR as usual, though you are not going to help convince Richard of our need to visit Mombasa you know!

Glad you both had a good holiday and good flight back. [:)]

Thanks,
Sarah

Thanks for the report,I think we had a FSM called Francesca on the way to BOS last month ,think she said she lived in France,she was excellent[y].

Decker,
Next time please choose a safer destination. Worried about you two the whole time you were away!

Chuck-

Very enjoyable TR. Nairobi sounds interesting (challenging?), to say the least. One of those places that reminds you that you're a long way from home, I guess...

Here's hoping you shake off the food poisoning (or ebola or whatever) before too long.

Thanks for the TR, and hope you both get well soon! I agree with NBO airport it is dire! [n]

DMB

Another excellent TR thanks [8D]

I hope you're both feeling better [:)]

Regards

Good to know Nairobi Airport has not improved much in the last 10 years!

What was the Hilton like - I have got a night there in September?

Thanks

Please excuse the lack of 'personalised' responses. We're still not quite well but we have high hopes for tomorrow!

Ironically we never lose the faith but we also never lose the will to point out how they could do better! We guess the bombing explains the mirror checks under cars as they pull into the Hilton and the X-Raying and metal detectors on the way in!

Interestingly I did check the Foreign Office before going and they counselled caution due to the terrorist threat.

I've added a review of the Hilton to the reviews page.

Thank you to all for your well wishes [:)]

Excellent TR Decker written, as ever, in a fantastic way.
'Ninja up'...love it! [:D]

Dean

I have this image of Decker enjoying a glass of Meursault-Charmes, reading de Tocqueville's Du systme pŽnitentaire aux ƒtats-Unis et de son application en France, listening to Jona Lewie's Greatest Hits, whilst bombs explode and buildings collapse all around him.

This man embodies the fine art of travel, IMHO. [y]

GJ

Thanks for the TR[y]

What is Nairobi like as a city; would it be worth taking a trip for the city in itself or only ever as a means of reaching Mombasa, Malindi, the parks etc.?

45.