VS009 LHR-JFK 4 APR 12 (Upper Class)

This is a Trip Report from the Upper Class cabin
Ground Staff
Food & Drink
Entertainment
Seat
Cabin Crew
This was the first flight of a work trip that would see me and my colleagues travel around North America on a busy itinerary, so the two of us who travel on VS were pleased to be able to upgrade this sector to UC using miles. We arrived at LHR at lunchtime and headed into T3. There was a short queue at the UC check-in desks, and although there was an agent directing people upstairs to the drive-through check-in, unfortunately she was called away to the Premium Economy check-in as we approached -- so we had to wait for a little while until there was a spare desk. Check-in was quick and efficient, but really there was no difference whatsoever from my many PE experiences and I think VS are missing a trick here -- a bit of humour or sparkle goes a long way after waiting in line at an airport.
And so off we went through the private security channel. This was my colleague's first experience of UC at LHR and she was duly impressed with the UC wing -- the security lane remains civilised and unproblematic, which is a blessing when you glance across to the chaos unfolding nearby. We zoomed through the now seemingly endless duty free shop, and headed up to the Clubhouse. Fortunately the lounge was very quiet, and we managed to book a facial for me and a haircut for her. But before all of that, it was time for lunch!
I must admit, thanks to previous experience I did not have very high expectations of either the food or the service, and whilst the latter was pretty unrefined, the former was miles better than I had predicted. Presentation and taste were excellent, and the wine wasn't bad either. I had some kind of salad and then a good curry; my colleague had a Scotch egg, I think, and then something else (forgotten -- sorry). Service was reasonably quick but not great (and various things were forgotten at random points, despite the restaurant not being at all busy).
After lunch I had a quick shower and it was time for the treatments -- my facial was OK but the therapist wasn't very talkative. My colleague's 30-minute hair treatment ended up lasting 90 minutes, which ate up all of our remaining time in the Clubhouse! I suppose she got her money's worth, but it was a bit frustrating as we had planned to have afternoon tea prior to boarding.
What about the flight? I like VS9 -- you can do half a day's work and then head to the airport, and then have dinner on the plane and arrive at a reasonable time without needing to go out for food in New York. Also, it is almost always an A346, and I much prefer them to the noisy and increasingly battered 747s.
The best laid plans....
In reality, Emmeline Heaney looked a bit worse for wear -- my suite was chipped and bashed all over the place (but nothing in comparison to G-VHOT last year). As we know, the low K-number seats are excellent -- private and very well situated, and I heartily recommend them. The flight was not very full -- probably about 70%, from memory -- and we enjoyed excellent service from the chap who was assigned to our section. (More on the crew later.)
Once we were installed in the seats, a glass of champagne was offered. Only a very humourless person indeed would frown at the coupe glasses, which make you feel like you should be taking a minor role in Brideshead Revisited. For all of their faded style, though, they are spectactularly impractical on an aeroplane -- they are very top heavy, and any jolt results in the liquid sloshing around threateningly -- those of you who have ever carried a baking tray full of water will know what I mean... Also, they do not really fit onto the drinks tray on the UCS -- the reading light gets in the way. So somebody really didn't think the idea through.
No complaints about the new dinner service, though -- the thing I care about most is the quality of the food and drink, rather than how it is served, and I was pleased to notice a clear upgrade. The Thai curry was good -- as was the sticky toffee pud. We both drank the viognier, which was nothing special but drinkable -- I still think that the quality of the wines in UC is not what it might (or should) be. The FSM herself came round with the wine and she was talkative and amusing -- she described herself as a milk-maid, and was refreshingly honest about the pros and cons of the new service routine. The long-awaited cheese trolley zoomed round and I really rather liked it. My guess is that it is ultimately a mistake, and will be quietly abandoned in the future, but if you want to have a leisurely dinner experience, coupled with lots of interaction with the crew, then this really hits the spot. I was in a good mood and I really appreciated the friendliness of the crew and the chance to grab an enormous serving of cheese and port.

V-Port was switched on quite quickly but about 15 minutes later it had to be restarted for the entire plane because it wasn't working for a large chunk of economy -- didn't bother me, but it does seem to me that the IFE is unreliable rather frequently; I can't remember a flight when it didn't need resetting (although not normally for the entire plane, I admit!). After that, the flight was straightforward -- a movie, a few cups of tea (I think there was more food, but I don't remember having any), and then onto the ground and a brisk walk to immigration where...
... everything went wrong. I have never encountered big delays coming in on VS9, but this time there was an enormous queue and rapid calculations suggested a two-hour wait (which turned out to be accurate). Things got so bad that various Brits started having a go at the US officials (rather them than me!). Said Brits were marched off to somewhere else -- whether this was a quicker immigration channel or death row was not obvious. Things were made immeasurably worse by the presence of a TV broadcasting Piers Morgan on CNN to everyone in the arrivals hall.

Still, even the darkest of clouds have silver linings. We got chatting to some strangers in the queue and we decided to share a ride into Manhattan with them, and then it turned out that we all had various connections in common, which was fun.
Conclusions? A great flight -- good FSM, good crew (lots of interaction), liked the service, and the Clubhouse was fun as ever.
Would it be the same on our return? [drum roll]
