This is a Trip Report from the Upper Class cabin
Ground Staff
Food & Drink
Entertainment
Seat
Cabin Crew
Smooth transition down from LBA, quick jaunt from T1 to T3 and presented ourselves at a queue-free Upper Class check-in. Wed already done OLCI but apparently still needed to go to the normal check-in desks due to the presence of an infant. Our pre-selected seats (6A & K) were confirmed, boarding passes and Clubhouse invites handed over and baby duly cooed at by a particularly broody set of security and check-in staff.
Headed straight for Fast Track (hah!) security where we spent more than half an hour grinding our teeth watching the queue for not-so-fast-track glide past us. To be fair the speed of the queue wasnt helped by a middle-aged gentleman who was point blank refusing to remove his jacket to go through the metal detector. What was he trying to hide? Upon finally being coerced into giving up the jacket it appeared he was guilty of nothing more than being in possession of an excessive underarm perspiration problem. Thank the Lord he didnt have to take his shoes off
Things moved steadily after this, and we were soon being welcomed into the Clubhouse. Although it is quite clearly in need of Phase 2 it really is quite a groovy place. It was about two thirds full, but the staff did a wonderful job of clearing us a spot where we could park mdvipond jr.s pram without causing too much of a potential Health and Safety hazard. Food and drink orders were swiftly taken, and we were soon tucking into a nice looking Greek salad for the Mrs. and a smashing array of sushi for me, complemented by a spankingly good mojito.
Mrs. mdvipond wandered off for her hair appointment at 2, leaving me with jr. and another of those fine mojitos. Feeling rather chilled by this point, I decided to wheel jr. round to the spa for a nosey. All very swish, and particularly liked the look of the Jacuzzi. Dumped the pram in the hair salon (Mrs. was still being coiffed) and sneaked off for a nicotine fix and another mojito whilst watching the BOS flight being despatched.
My better half re-appeared looking, rather ironically (and as the old TV ad used to say), like shed just stepped out of a salon. I was enjoying a bitter-sweet moment with my last Malboro Light for 10 hours and wondering if I had time for another mojito. However, having learnt that being accompanied by a minor means giving yourself at least half an hour more to do even the most basic of things, we started to pack up for the walk down to the gate. Despite our best laid plans, by the time wed got to the gate and had broken down and packed the pram (something akin to dismantling a small and unruly hang-glider) a good number of Y pax had swarmed past us down the tunnel. Now, sans pram, my darling daughter isnt the lightest bundle-of-joy to bear, and there was no way I was going to stand patiently in line so, brandishing jr. ahead of me for maximum effect we excuse-med our way down the queue and onto Mustang Sally. Settled quickly in 6A & K, jr. was secured to Mrs, champagne offered and gratefully received.
The suites appeared to be in good nick, the odd chip out of the TV surround, but nothing too obvious. IFBT did the rounds with the OB packs which were looking sadly depleted since our last trip. No polos? No fair! We were airborne more or less as per schedule with mdvipond jr., thankfully, nonplussed by the thrill of take off. We were soon presented with an eagerly anticipated Tanqueray No. 10 and tonic, food orders were duly taken, then V:Port sprung into action with the usual mixture of bland news and unwanted adverts. As soon as it settled down both Mrs. mdvipond and I launched ourselves into a spirited and over-competitive game of triv. Trounced her twice before she quit clearly vanquished and sobbing slightly - before I myself got totally crushed by some nerd in 44C.
As dinner appeared to be on its way, we converted Mrs. mdviponds suite into bed mode and lay our blissfully comatose baby down whilst we sat to eat together at my suite. First time weve done this and it really works well. Much more civilised than the TV dinner mode that we usually go for. My chosen starter was broccoli and stilton soup, which was very nice in a gloopy sort of way, and Mrs. mdvipond had the chicken and mozzarella salad which she thoroughly enjoyed. She then opted for the jacket spuds from the Smaller Bites (soggy) and I waited, and waited, and waited for my salmon and hake with fishy rice. Finally realised Id been forgotten (happens to me all the time), but a quiet word resulted in an apology and a two minute turn-round. Not bad at all, salmon was nicer than the rather dry hake, but the fishy rice was good. Very fishy... Still, bloody funny menu if you ask me would it kill them to stick a decent fillet steak and/or a chicken dish on there?!? Wine wise, went for Marsanne/Viognier which was most pleasant.
Watched Flightplan after dinner ridiculous in the extreme and darn enjoyable for it then did the leg stretch thing down to Y and back. Seemed rude to pass the bar without stopping off for a wee slurp, so partook of a glass or two of decent Oz Shiraz before returning to la famille up front. Regrettably, mdvipond jr. had woken and was entertaining our fellow passengers with her rather convincing impression of a peeled baby in a bag of salt. Everyone appeared to be relatively understanding, and as soon as she disappeared up her mothers sweater for a spot of tiffin, peace and quiet quickly resumed.
Had another bash at triv on V:Port, but the uber-nerd in 44C was still ruling the roost. With Mrs. and jr. away in the land of nod, I returned to the bar and the Shiraz.
Seat belt sign all too soon popped on, so I staggered back to 6K for an uneventful final approach and landing into Newark. Onto stand quickly, disembarked smoothly, then realised that we didnt have a clue where the pram/unruly hang-glider was supposed to reappear. After hanging around watching most of Y, once again, stream past us, we were informed that the pram would show up at baggage reclaim (we had originally been told it would be at the gate, but the mojito/Taqueray/Shiraz combination had left me rather unwilling to argue the point). The down side was, we were now at the back of the queue for immigration, although jr. was decent enough to stay asleep throughout. More than an hour later, cases and pram were waiting for us as promised, as was the nice chauffeur lady who was kind enough to waive the charge for the hour plus waiting time we should have incurred. At the hotel by 8ish local time (the Ritz-Carlton Central Park, cant recommend in highly enough).
All in all, another cracking flight; the clubhouse, the staff, the suites, and the bar are all still great, the food, sadly, aint quite so great as it used to be. However - and most importantly for this trip VS/UCS gets the baby-friendly thumbs up, with mdvipond jr.s behaviour proving better than that of some adult pax Ive had the misfortune to share air space with.
Sorry if that was a little long. Will try and make the return TR shorter
