This is a Trip Report from the Premium Economy cabin
Ground Staff
Food & Drink
Entertainment
Seat
Cabin Crew
Do you know, in some parts of this island up in the mountains you could be driving across the downs on the Berkshire/Oxfordshire border. Spooky.
Anyway, it's a lovely day, the sun's shining and our driver's providing a running commentary throughout the journey. We arrive at the Airport around 2.45 and head for check in. This part of the building is really very modern and compares with any other airport in the world. After an initial check of our passports and tickets we head to the joint PE/UCS check in. If you don't have a ticket they don't let you in the airport.
After a few minutes we were checked in and again we get our pre selected seats (79a & c and 78a) offload our bags and head for security. At this point we enter what must be the old building which I have to say is a bit oppressive, we put our carry ons through the xray machines and my bag is searched. I forgot to take out the 2 bottles of Diet Coke and the security lady isn't happy until I offer to bin them.
Next on to immigration to hand in the exit slips we retained on entry and then into the departure lounge which was really 1980s, very small and a very low ceiling, even more oppressing. At this point we decide we're all hungary so we queue at the only real eating place in the lounge called Island Grill which is sort of like a Jamaican McDonalds but a bit more disorganised. After about 10 minutes (I kid you not) our food arrived. My cheeseburger was edible but very bland. My wife's chicken burger was excellent, shredded jerk chicken with salad and the frys were also pretty good. My son had the same as me but thought it was quite good so maybe I'm being unfair about mine.
We had a look around the shops which took around 5 minutes, bought a few bits and pieces and sat back down to wait for our flight to be called. Bang on time they called UCS, PE and wheel chair passengers to the gate specifically asking other passengers to wait for a further announcement. Needless to say no one took any notice and it seemed like the whole airport got up and headed to another security check that leads to all the gates.
We stood in the queue waiting our turn when a chap came barging through holding his passport on high which I thought was a bit pointless as we were all getting on the same plane. We had our documents checked and made our way upstairs to the plane. This was parked at a gate at the the far end of the terminal which meant at least a 5 minute walk during which we were passed by many people in an obvious hurry. I mention this because when we got to the gate there were a number of security people checking all the boarding passes and splitting people into 2 queues. UCS/PE on one side and Y on the other.
Priority Boarding Jamaican Style, so why can't they do this at Gatwick? Unfortunately most of the people that passed us in an obvious hurry were told to move into the by now much longer Y queue and some of them were no obviously unhappy that there efforts for a quick trip to the gate were wasted including the chap that barged past us in the security queue previously. I have to say I did have a little chuckle to myself when I saw him.
After about 5 minute we were making our way onto the plane and upstairs to a nice cool glass of orange juice. we got ourselves comfortable and waited for the announcements for seatbelts and take off. And waited, and waited and waited. Without boring you to death we left 2 1/2 hours late due to a number of late passengers. If it was me I would have left them behind but reading between the lines I think there was some politics going on with Air Jamaica who gave up this route to VS last year.
Anyway the Captain said he knew a short cut[:?] and would try and make up some time on route. Film wise I watched Run Fatboy Run (hilarious) and a re run of Only Fools and Horses. Dinner was Coq au Vin which was actually quite tasty. The crew on this flight were pretty good but spent a lot of time chating loudly in the galley about their Jamaican experiences. They certainly weren't as good as the outbound guys but by no means bad.
Our route home was up the eastern seaboard during which my son and I watched the most spectacular series of electrical storms we've ever seen. This I guess accounted for one of the roughest flights I've ever been on. Not too severe but constant roughness which lasted for several hours. This highlighted the fact that these older PE seats on the LGW 747s are starting to get a bit uncomfortable. I don't know if they replace the padding on these but I'm sure I could feel parts of the frame through the seat and back. I tried to get some sleep and catnapped a bit listening to a guy trying to hypnotise me (it didn't work but was relaxing) on one of the radio channels. Eventually I opened my eyes to a rising sun and checked my watch, 6.50am.
We were served breakfast, a chewy cereal bar and a yogurt as we headed towards Jersey. Whatever happened to the hot breakfast they used to serve? Our last few flights, all in PE, have all been served cold breakfast on the return leg is this more cost cutting? Anyway, as we headed to Gatwick and started our approach the remains of breakfast were cleared away and would you believe it no stacking, just straight in and one of the smoothest landings I've ever known but 90 minutes late.
As we got to the gate a strange thing happened. First the Captain announced that the security services were going to meet us at the gate and that we should all remain seated until the seatbelt sign was extinguished and then one of the crew asked if two named gentlemen were on board. In my strategic position above the exit door I could see armed police make their way up to the walkway and then they obviously made their way onto the plane. Clearly being upstairs we couldn't see what was going on downstairs until we saw them emerge a few minutes later with a single individual in handcuffs. Exciting stuff for a sunday morning.
So then we got our stuff together and made our way off the plane, on to immigration and up to the baggage hall where the handcuffed gentlemen was waiting with armed police. He couldn't have been very happy spending all that time on a plane only to arrive and end up in a cell. Our bags appeared after around 20 minutes and that was it, through customs, a quick sniff by a drugs dog, a taxi to pick the car up, a drive up the M25/M4 and home.
Another enjoyable holiday over and the joys of jet lag to look forward to.
Miopyk[8D]
