VS020 SFO-LHR 25 Feb 08 (Upper)

This is a Trip Report from the Upper Class cabin

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Aircraft Name: Mustang Sally
Aircraft Reg: G-VROC

I've decided that a maxim along the lines of 'never write a trip report in anger' is probably a good one to live by, which is why I've left it a few days after getting off the VS20 to compose this. However, I can't not explain why I got so angry on the flight, so I'm going to catagorise this TR as 'A series of unfortunate incidents contributing to a rising sense of anger directed at the FSM'. This was also my seventh longhaul flight since Christmas, and I'm writing this on my ninth, so I'm feeling like I've run quite the gamut of in-flight experiences recently.

Initially, it all started out so well. The Other Mr Morgan had been to visit me in San Francisco for a month, and the timing of his return flight coincided with a trip I needed to make to Dubai, so we were able to fly back to London together. The landside location of the SF Clubhouse was additionally helpful as he's still, despite everyone concerned's best efforts, a smoker, so he was able to sidle out for a few cigarettes closer to departure than usual. Given he's not a great flyer at the best of times, this seemed additionally helpful.

The CH was seriously empty, and I'd realised when I checked us in online (10 and 11K upstairs) that the flight was going to be likewise, as at least half the UC seats were unallocated (I'd upgraded us with miles). We got there in plenty of time and had a very chilled stay (I noted in another thread that they were stocking Virgin Comics Dan Dare title, which we both approved of). Mustang Sally was our plane, and is the first Virgin plane we'd flown on together, almost exactly a year to the day earlier, so that was a nice detail. I knocked back a Mojito which almost blew my head off and the tuna salad with wasabi dressing, which is a recently discovered favourite.

Boarding was announced early, and courtesy of a final cigarette we were actually among the very last aboard, which is where the presentiments that things were about to get very aggravating kicked in. At the aircraft door the FSM tried to direct us into the forward cabin, and when I said 'no, we're upstairs', his response was 'Oh so you are lads. I've had a heavy weekend.' Initial impression: Over familiar, unprofessional, and clearly trying too hard to be a 'personality'.

We got upstairs, settled in with some champagne and were introduced to the *brilliant* crew member who gave us excellent service and attention throughout (I feel slightly bad about the low score I've given the crew here for that reason, but really, I have to reflect the impact of the FSM), and the IFBT who remembered me from previous flights. Being more familiar with the crew routines than he, TOMM asked me if we were likely to see much of the FSM, to whom we'd both immediately taken a dislike. I said we *might* get an introduction, but maybe not (we didn't), and otherwise it would depend whether he gave himself anything to do during the meal service (he didn't, at least not upstairs).

As is often the case in SF, we were ready for departure about 15 minutes ahead of schedule, which is when FSM incident number 2 happened. 'Ladies and gentlemen, if you have a mobile phone, we're all *very* impressed, but now you need to switch it off and enable the flight safe mode if you intend to use it in flight. If you don't know how to do that, you've obviously got a far more complicated phone than you actually need.' Add 'patronising', 'insulting' and top up the 'unprofessional' a bit more.

He embellished all his early announcements with comments about the looks of the crew (both positive and negative) and his own opinions on anything and everything, desperately trying to reinforce the 'personality/entertainer' role with a delivery that made him sound like a bad local radio DJ and just making himself, and VAA by extension, even more detestable) and TOMM reached a point where he said 'If, god forbid, there's an emergency on this flight, I don't want to have to trust my safety to that w***er, because I have absolutely no confidence in him'.

As I said earlier we had great service from our own crew, dinner was very pleasant, and the Chenin Blanc very acceptable. I got a massage from the IFBT just before I settled down to sleep, and I managed a good few hours, so I don't have a lot to say about the middle of the flight.

I roused myself as breakfast was underway, and decided to forgo eating. When we'd been planning the flight, TOMM had said he liked the idea of being able to eat in Revivals and get a bit more kip, but then he'd spotted the full breakfast and succumbed to ordering a wake-up. He said he didn't regret it.

I'm going to wrap up with a selection of the rest of the FSM's most inglorious moments from the latter part of the flight.

One of the crew made the obviously fairly serious Change for Children announcement. She happened to be Irish, and *immediately* she'd finished, the FSM came on and said 'Anyone who needs that last announcement translating, just ask.' So we're apparently now insulting any Irish people on board Virgin flights then, as well as the ability of his crew member.

'We're getting a beautiful view of London this morning as we approach Heathrow along the Thames. Well, passengers on the right hand side will get the view. Those on the left will be seeing the less glamorous, more seedy, South London.' That's South London where we live then.

'If you need any assistance once you're in the terminal, just look out for Virgin staff. They're in exactly the same uniforms as your crew, but they're not as good looking.' So we're also insulting the rest of your own colleagues then.


Seriously, I know some of this might sound trivial and possibly that I'm over-reacting in going on to make a formal complaint about this t***er (which I am, with TOMM's blessing), but I used to work for an airline, and I'm passionate about good, professional customer service, and this guy is an insult to every good FSM in the Virgin fleet, and a discredit to the brand. My long term love affair with VAA has taken a bit a a knock recently with what seems increasingly penny-pinching chipping away at the service and some less than stellar delivery by in-flight teams. I still love the brand and want it to keep succeeding, but if I happened to be on another flight run by this one guy it could actually be the final nail in the coffin.

I'd be interested to know if anyone else recognises the performance from their own experiences, and what you think if you do.

[Pete]

A tricky situation. I guess if you like the informal approach, then you'd be more like to warm to that FSMs routine; however, as you've probably identified, if that kind of over-familiarity isn't your bag, then each further quip is going to grate. I've experienced the kind of banter you describe, and personally (so far at least) it's made me smile. Perhaps I see wandering off the written script as a device that makes people take notice of the otherwise bland announcements, and that's ok in my book. I can see how it can get annoying if it's not your thing, though.

I suspect there's always going to be a polarisation of views amongst a few hundred people crammed into a metal tube for several hours, so the safe bet for any would-be stand up comedian / cabin crew is keep the one liners to a minimum.

[Nottingham Nick]

I don't have a problem with banter per se, but some of the FSM's comments are too OTT for my liking.

Publicly poking fun at the accent of a junior crew member, with a view to humiliating them, could be classed as bullying.

I will be interested in Virgin's reaction. That is, if they actually read your complaint; and it doesn't go to the 'thanks for writing, here is 10K miles' department. [V]

Nick

[Decker]

I think it's perfectly reasonable that this annoys you BUT I'd probably find it amusing. As Pete so clearly indicates, horses for courses. [;)]

I personaly like the informality some FSMs on VS seem to have. We had a hoot of 'fellow camp Scot' FSM the otherday - he was real comic but I never doubted his proffesionalism which came to the fore when he had to deal with a serious issue during the flight.

[Darren Wheeler]

It does sound like this FSM was being a clown. One of the key roles of the FSM is lead by example so that it rubs off on the rest of the crew. Perhaps this explains some of the inconsistencies in service that have been reported.

To insult other crew members publicly over the PA, regardless of whether it was in jest and with their consent, is quite appalling and does nothing to promote the brand. To offer a translation for another smacks of serious bullying and needs stamping on hard. Most companies would call that Gross Misconduct and is grounds for dismissal.

I'd be interested to see what Crawley have to say about it. At the very least they need to investigate it and not just go through the usual miles + meaningless reply.

Originally posted by Darren Wheeler
. To describe one as a 'w***er' so openly and then offer a translation for another smacks of serious bullying and needs stamping on hard. Most companies would call that Gross Misconduct and is grounds for dismissal.

When did the FSM call a member of crew a W***er ? [:?]

[RichardMannion]

Interesting TR Jon - and I can see why you'd be pissed off. If this routine had been done on a B&S route then I would be slightly less concerned but the fact remains it was not. SFO is a key business route, and as such I'd expect a professional service. The typical demographic of a UC customer is male, mid 40's (so Pete or Decker then...[B)]), and most likely travelling on business.

There is a desired level of professionalism wanted from a FSM as they are meant to be the role model for all other crew to follow on board; and as we have all noted in the past, if you have a bad flight its typically due to a poor/weak FSM at the helm.

Maybe a bit rich coming from my mouth, but there is an aspect of knowing your audience and being professional at your job. Some of the comments made by the FSM were far from required, esp. the humiliation of the Irish member of crew. This FSM needs pulling up rather quickly and disciplined.

Thanks,
Richard

[Darren Wheeler]

Originally posted by hackneyguy

Originally posted by Darren Wheeler
. To describe one as a 'w***er' so openly and then offer a translation for another smacks of serious bullying and needs stamping on hard. Most companies would call that Gross Misconduct and is grounds for dismissal.

When did the FSM call a member of crew a W***er ? [:?]

[:#]Grovelling apologies. I mis-read the line. Have removed the libelous line [:#]

Originally posted by Darren Wheeler

Originally posted by hackneyguy

Originally posted by Darren Wheeler
. To describe one as a 'w***er' so openly and then offer a translation for another smacks of serious bullying and needs stamping on hard. Most companies would call that Gross Misconduct and is grounds for dismissal.

When did the FSM call a member of crew a W***er ? [:?]

[:#]Grovelling apologies. I mis-read the line. Have removed the libelous line [:#]

Hey no probs - after all it's Sunday morning & we all need the caffine and croissants to kick in. Enjoy your day [8D]

[ChuckC]

Jon,
Your reaction to the FSM is understandable; even if you were the only passenger who found his comments unacceptable, your comments should be heard at Crawley.

In the main I tend to prefer flight crew who exhibit courtesy and warm professionalism. If it is mixed with a bit of informality here and there, so be it. Beyond that, as Pete said, 'keep the oneliners to a minimum.'

Chuck-

Originally posted by ChuckC
Jon,
Your reaction to the FSM is understandable; even if you were the only passenger who found his comments unacceptable, your comments should be heard at Crawley.

In the main I tend to prefer flight crew who exhibit courtesy and warm professionalism. If it is mixed with a bit of informality here and there, so be it. Beyond that, as Pete said, 'keep the oneliners to a minimum.'

Chuck-

I think Chuck's balance between professionalism and informality is about right - in this instance Jon I tend toward agreeing with you. Personally, I find short and very infrequent jovial episodes on the PA perfectly OK, the VS crews who think it's a medium for intercrew conversations and have a habit of going on about meaningless drivel are too much.

Oh, and why do they all start their announcements with 'well'? Well what? Well where did that come from?

This guy sounds familiar. I've flown with a 'clever dick' male FSM who fancied himself, made lots of crass 'sultry Susan' and 'raunchy Rachel'-type comments on the PA, similar condescending stuff about drinking alcohol, then once airborne didn't lift a finger during the service, took about an hour to start up the IFE, and the service on the flight generally sucked.

This guy doesn't need disciplining, big-headed, tactless and culturally insensitive, he needs showing the door.

Mike

[buns]

Jon

Using time to reflect was wise - I would have loved to have seen your immediate response[}:)]

To my mind Richard's post sums it up - professionalism from the FSM is key. It takes a professional to know when a light hearted comment is appropriate and when heart felt concern is required.

Thank you for sharing your experience, let us all hope that VS sit up and take note

buns

They sound like the type of comments you would hear at a cheap drag act in southern spain or blackpool.

Still I suppose its better than surly, condescending or indifferent which sometimes occurs.

Thanks guys. I want to stress that I'm not at all a killjoy, and have no problem with the occasional joke and deviation from the script - in fact, I'd rather the delivery was indeed a bit human and not scripted as long as the key points were put across. It's the forced nature of this guy's delivery, and the lack of professionalism that gave me the major problem, plus the fact that he clearly had no problem whatsoever putting down his colleagues in the interests of what he thought was humour. He actually did come across exactly like that kind of act, EGG - thanks for the analogy.

And I'm slap bang in the demographic you cite Richard, and several of the others in it sitting near me were clearly not amused by him either.

I just flew back on the 19 today and had an FSM that didn't deviate much from the script, but just enough to make it clear he had a natural personality of his own. It was only when I heard, and was calmed by, that, that I realised exactly how wound up I still was about last week's performance.

[fozzyo]

For me, the behaviour of the FSM is unacceptable. Personally I prefer the more friendly less formal (rather than informal) approach Virgin generally has. However, that doesn't mean being over friendly and forgetting professional standards and courtesy to both passengers and fellow crew.

We have had two outstanding flights I can think of with Virgin, in both cases the quality of the flight was down to the FSM. On one of them the FSM did make some good, very inclusive jokes during the initial announcements that did go down well with the passengers, but above all the crew performed exceptionally well and he worked hard during the flight - leading from the top. By all accounts the crew always like to work with him as he does have an excellent reputation.

Clearly as a very frequent flyer I would hope that you don't get the nice form letter response. But I suspect not many are holding our breath over that.

Mat

It's difficult for the CC to please everyone. On a flight from BOS-LHR we parked at a remote stand. Over the PA a FA announced 'the stairs have been attached to the aircraft however there is a bit of a gap ... so you may have to jump'. To which (in general) the British PAX belly laughed whereas the US PAX were outraged swearing never to fly such an unprofessional airline again.

Saying that, it was only the second PA quip of the flight, and no quips at individual where yours went OTT on.

Originally posted by RichardMannion
If this routine had been done on a B&S route then I would be slightly less concerned but the fact remains it was not. SFO is a key business route, and as such I'd expect a professional service.

[V] Dear oh dear... The suggestion of crass service being (even) the tiniest bit more acceptable to B&S PAX dismays me.

My expectation of crew professionalism is based on an Airline's brand , not the destination or whether I'm travelling for business or pleasure. Consequently, I would find this FSM's behaviour no less acceptable on my next PE Orlando flight, than it would be on my next UC SFO flight.

Oh dear. A bit of gentle humour is welcome, but he sounds like a right pillock.

Is SFO really a business route though? HKG, BOM, LOS are, but I'd have had it somewhere in the middle.

[RichardMannion]

Originally posted by rod10

Originally posted by RichardMannion
If this routine had been done on a B&S route then I would be slightly less concerned but the fact remains it was not. SFO is a key business route, and as such I'd expect a professional service.

[V] Dear oh dear... The suggestion of crass service being (even) the tiniest bit more acceptable to B&S PAX dismays me.

My expectation of crew professionalism is based on an Airline's brand , not the destination or whether I'm travelling for business or pleasure. Consequently, I would find this FSM's behaviour no less acceptable on my next PE Orlando flight, than it would be on my next UC SFO flight.

Hi Rod,

I hear you - I said 'slightly', as overall the FSM's behaviour is unacceptable. Maybe I am speaking out of turn but customers on B&S routes are possibly going to be in a more jovial/happy mood so it would have less bearing. It's not universal of course, I'm like you I want the same professional service across the board.

Thanks,
Richard

Originally posted by Swanhunter
Is SFO really a business route though? HKG, BOM, LOS are, but I'd have had it somewhere in the middle.

It's probably a bit more mixed than some, but certainly I'd say that a majority of the people travelling on my very regular trips (in all cabins) are doing so on business - the Silicon Valley effect on this route is massive.

In the height of summer the balance shifts more towards leisure.

I think sometimes that it's all just a little too enthuastic (in particular for the business routes). I was on VS010 (JFK) a few months back and as we landed at LHR.

The FSM called for 'a round of applause for all the boys and girls in the crew who've stayed awake all night to serve you'.

(Actually they'd been one of those 'invisible cabin crews' that you run in to from time to time.)

In response to thiis request there was complete silence in Upper other than one of the more junior crew eventually expressing (somewhat sadly)

'No one's clapping up here'.
[:?]

Let's not get hung up thinking that this a VS only issue. OK, it was a particularly challenging landing in SFO, and perhaps it's my natural reserve, but I'm not sure the UA FSM trying to lead a chant of 'Who's The Daddy?' in praise of the flight crew was entirely appropriate.

At to the OP, if you thought it bang out of order it's worth the feedback. Otherwise, how do they know? And it is a relatively simple thing to fix at low or zero cost.

Paul

[Decker]

Originally posted by pjh
Let's not get hung up thinking that this a VS only issue. OK, it was a particularly challenging landing in SFO, and perhaps it's my natural reserve, but I'm not sure the UA FSM trying to lead a chant of 'Who's The Daddy?' in praise of the flight crew was entirely appropriate.

Paul

Probably been watching Maury...