Originally posted by Nevil30Hope this level of drinking will not affect future trip reports
Nevil, it may even enhance them...
A Bacardi and vodka fuelled trip report:
VS000 MAN-TFN
Massive queue at check-in, which were alright Ôcause weÕd packed a four pack of Special Brew just in case. Me and the Mrs supped two each and time flew by. We left our two kids, Chlamydia and Asbo, skidding on their knees up and down the terminal. They kept nearly getting run over by middle-aged couples with them posh cases with wheels on. It were a right laugh.
Got to the security fella who were a right miserable sod. Asked us if weÕd packed our own cases and Mrs. says Ònah, we got an Arab to do itÓ and that really upset the apple cart. It held the whole queue up for an hour, which were a right laugh.
DidnÕt do online check-in cause AsboÕs the only one who knows how to use the computer and he were too hungover from his mateÕs sixth birthday party the day before. Check-in girl gave us four seats together right in the centre of the plane which was fine by us Ôcause itÕs easier to lead a sing-a-long when youÕre in the middle of everyone.
Went through security sharpish and straight to duty free for a bottle of Bacardi which went great with our McMuffin for breakfast. Chlamydia and Asbo decided to have a food fight with their Happy Meals, which were a right laugh.
Got called to get on the plane after an hour or so, which werenÕt so easy Ôcause Mrs werenÕt feeling too good. Bad can of Special Brew I reckon. After take-off, Mrs headed for the bog to make a bit of room and I ordered four vodka and tonics. She said she felt much better after drinking them, so I decided to order four for myself as well. Asbo had got bored of kicking the seat in front if him by now so we gave him that little plastic trumpet he likes so much and sent him off to play with Chlamydia through the curtains at the front of the cabin. This gave us a bit of well earned peace and quiet to pass out for a bit.
We got woken up by a hostess who had the kids with her and said they couldnÕt go past the curtain. Asbo told her to f*^k off, which were a right laugh. Mind you, she gave us our dinners which came with wine, which Mrs thought was really posh. The food was really great, just like the stuff we get at home from Iceland.
After a load of wine and some more voddy and tonics we tried to start a sing-a-long with some of the other passengers, but most of Ôem were right toffy nosed gits and one in particular got right on my nerves, so I head-butted him. Well, whoÕd have thought a simple head-butt would have started such a big fuss. Before you knew if theyÕd sat on my head and stuck me in handcuffs. Then when we landed they had me carted off by the rozzers. Which were a right laugh.