This is a Trip Report from the Upper Class cabin
Ground Staff
Food & Drink
Entertainment
Seat
Cabin Crew
The next morning everyone was up and excited and in no time two Addison Lee vehicles had arrived to 'whisk' (ahem) them all to the airport. Hint for next time guys - 08:00 pickup - A406 BAD idea - go A4 route. Driving past the strangely lamentably missing Concorde we joined the Cluster**** that is dropping off outside T3. BAA efforts not withstanding we were soon all reunited and on our way to UC Checkin. Much to Lady Ss surprise up ahead Decker suddenly hugged a man catching up we all had the pleasant surprise of being greeted by Maverick who was on his way to a meeting and wouldnt be able to meet with us in the Club House. A welcome start to the journey and thence onwards to security. Ahead of us an old dear span a sympathy defence as to why she shouldn't be in the economy queue and the security guy ushered her into the UC sanctum apologising that he couldn't guarantee an upgrade. Realising we were 'ensemble' he then saw us all at once and pointed us into the queue where we were rapidly seen by a black shirted check in person. Realising her badge didn't have 'Mosley' on it we looked more closely at her badge and saw the word 'Premier'.... seems that Premier team are being seconded to LHR to learn the ropes - good idea!
We were again dealt with en mass - although she must be newish as she didn't flinch at seeing LRoM's name! All bags processed we trouped to the Club House via ONE lane of Fast Pass. Non Fastpass was a nightmare, the longest we've seen it in a long time. Shoe carnival was avoided by simply ignoring the lemming like mob and skirting that particular crew. Mrs D and LSoM had been sent on ahead to avoid the Travelex queues and the rest of the party soon found them in the bistro at a large table, booth like, backing against the left wall.
Shortly after this touching reunion there was a kerfuffle as a couple of VS ground staff escorted Jordan and Peter Andr_ and a couple of others to the table behind ours. Now GUESSING here but it seems a fair bet that neither of these are GB TOP, possibly not even Au but over the next 30 minutes the Station Manager dropped by bringing water and various other staff members dropped by to recall past meetings with said celebs. Call it sour grapes if you will but if crew could pay the same attention to loyal customers it might actually have a better knock on effect.
One group member disappeared to check mail and use the toilet and upon leaving the cubicle found he'd been keeping the seat warm for Mr Andr_. He rejoined the others and was as surprised as they to see an off duty Russell Brand head towards the same toilets. There'd been some cosmic irony at play if Mr Andr_ was to warm the seat for Mr Brand!
Shortly thereafter several group members left for their treatments culminating in Decker, Fozzyo and Wolves27 gracing the jacuzzi with their presence. This was enjoyed by all (well, Mrs D was none too pleased with Decker's insistence on Speedos but as Wolves27 points out, it could have been far worse, it could have been a thong) and shortly thereafter the motley ensemble were reunited awaiting their gate call.
This came later than expected due to some problems on board. Interestingly every boarding announced included the information that 'Priority Boarding WAS in operation - just look for the sign'. When we got to Gate 19 there was no sign BUT we're all too much of old hands to let this faze us so we walked to the front and where let through the tensa by someone who acknowledged our existence at least! We toyed with ignoring the residual queue and walking to the front but decided against it. Eventually we were seen and all on board to our chosen seats all around 5-10K and a middle seat.
The cabin looked to be in good condition (G-VRED - so new economy) as we all settled in using our respective routines. The Captain announced a short flying time - less than 11 hours and after the obligatory delay caused by waiting for some paperwork to be finalised (this is right up there with 'Ugandan discussions' in the euphemism stakes we suspect) we took off and headed East.
The following is a pasted together set of flight recollections by the collective and will not be chronological!
Upon boarding the assembled hordes were horrified by the sight of a young couple with a baby estimated at less than a year old boarding and sitting directly opposite the Deckers and Dean. Given that none of the flyers have children (well they were going away for a short weekend in Tokyo so you can intuit that) this is an understandable stance despite the beliefs to the contrary by others with children. However gamely they opted for the benefit of the doubt stance. This was to prove to be woefully inappropriately optimistic.
Shortly before take off Mitchja was asked to move from his preallocated seat so that the couple could sit together. This was a bit bizarre as there were other sets of two seats available the flight had at least 10 available J seats. However he complied and moved back one. Immediately after takeoff the V-flyer vultures descended and grabbed extra pillows from the vacant seats leaving several still available a point that will become important later.
The gentlemans suite was converted into a bed and the baby was bedded down. Very selfless we thought as he perched himself on his ottoman and alternated between that and his wifes.
Food time came and ALL the V-Flyers ordered the Bento Box. After a short while it became apparent that there was a problem as an FA tried to persuade a couple of V-Flyers to accept a Bento Box assembled from Y components. Not best pleased with this we began querying why we couldnt just have our choice of meal and were informed that only 9 UC Bento Boxes had been loaded for a load of approx 35 UC pax (the majority of whom were Japanese) and that we therefore couldnt monopolise them.
Given that Bento Boxes had been the subject of much drooling for the past few months we insisted that as Golds we should take precedence. The FA looking nervous summonsed the CSS who basically told us that the flight was packed with Golds and wed just have to lump it. Angered by this we requested an audience with the FSM who explained that she hadnt actually studied the passenger manifest yet (probably explains the lack of greetings to Au members) but she knew there were a lot on board. She offered to check the manifest and came back with the statement that there were approximately 26 Au in UC. Slightly mollified by this we conceded and in a partial compromise they found another person who would sacrifice their choice thus leaving us one Bento Box short. Lady S took one for the team opting for the chicken tikka. After the meal we wandered back and checked the Galley notes and unsurprisingly found there were 7 Au on board in UC of which we were 6! The FSM was again approached and this time she explained that the 26 figure was FC members on board of any colour. But she explained there HAD been a lot of Au Op Ups to UC at the last minute.
Like a dog with a bone we pressed her on this and checking her notes she conceded that there had in fact been ONE Au op up bringing the cabin total to 8 Au. It transpires that some other pax had insisted that they could eat nothing but Bento Boxes and that the crew had decided to put their preferences over ours. Naturally we were less than impressed with this and asked the FSM whether the standing order about Aus getting first choice had been changed. No, she said, it hadnt and she was terribly sorry. Early on in the debacle shed offered Lady S 5,000 miles and suggested it be taken up with Customer Services.
In some respects we felt a little sorry for the FSM she explained that she had been on some NRT flights with a full load of J and only 4 Bento Boxes loaded. We can only assume this is a bean counting exercise again as Bento Boxes in all their glory are bound to cost more than chicken tikkas.
(Later in a dual aggravation Lady S was to be denied her first breakfast choice as all of the muffins had gone).
Shortly after the meal service Mrs D put in her breakfast order thereby becoming one of the first people on the flight to order breakfast and everyone bedded down well Decker fell asleep sitting up and awoke a few hours later and headed for the bar where he was engaged by a gentleman wanting to talk Vista vs Mac. After an hour or so of this a low wailing turned into a fully fledged bawling as the baby decided that the pax had had enough sleep. (Now this statement is NOT to be taken literally, the baby is not responsible for its being a baby the parents have that responsibility). More and more people wandered blearily to the bar complaining of being woken. This continued for some hours with Mitchja being woken despite his QCs.
Whilst he was at the bar the CSS went to his seat and started to remove one of his spare pillows. She was asked what she was doing by Mrs D and replied that the father of the baby didnt have a pillow and needed one as he was moving to another suite leaving the baby crying in his. This was like a red rag to a bull and in no uncertain terms she was told that this was completely unreasonable. The baby had not paid for a suite and the father had chosen to give it up to the baby. In any case there were other spares on the plane they just took a little more effort to find so why penalise an Au for the comfort of someone who was making an entire cabins life a misery? Apparently there were less spares than usual as a passenger had been ill on some.
After literally several hours of this an irate American pax woken for the third time came to the bar and demanded that a crew member do something about the baby. Dragging herself away from the male passenger shed spent the past hour flirting with she went to have words with the babys parents and they were all moved to the alcove behind the bar and curtained off. The baby continued screaming but at least the people at the bar were already awake!
In a final irony it transpired that the baby had woken the Captain who was asleep in Crew Quarters on his rest break and that he had had to complain to the FAs as well!
As the flight progressed the crew just abandoned the bar area to the pax and at one stage all 7 V-Flyers surrounded the bar on all sides looking after their own refreshment requirements. This was really poor management by the FSM who basically let the crew get away with murder.
At various stages throughout the flight the V-Flyer contingent took the time to wander around the cabin checking out the new PE and new Economy seats and were quite impressed with what they saw.
Joining the bunch at the bar Mrs D requested one of the light bites a toasted cheese sandwich. It was with some surprise therefore that she received her toast and jam some minutes later. This was rectified but the replacement was more chutney than cheese.
Finally the baby was quiet and breakfast was served. As noted Lady S didnt get what she wanted and despite the early pre order neither did Mrs D! The FSM was very attentive to our complaints and ensured that she took all of our contact details for her post flight report. She was surprised to hear that none of our 7 had been seen by the IFBT and ensured that Lady S was seen. As landing approached the IFBT came to each seat and explained in detail why people hadnt been seen because they had been treated in the Club House. She also explained that current guidelines were that if you were seen in the Club House you were NOT entitled to a priority card if you were missed on board, awake or not. This marks a further diminution in the already diminished IFBT service.
Landing was landing and we made our way to Immigration. Immigration as she should be. Quick check of docs and cheerfully waved through in minutes. Onwards to the luggage carousels and half of our groups luggage arrived immediately and the rest after 30 minutes #61516;. Out to be met by our driver and back to the Mandarin Oriental.
In summary a great flight on the company side but really poor on the staff and catering side.
THIS TRIP REPORT HAS BEEN READ AND APPROVED BY ALL THE V-FLYER CONTINGENT PRESENT. [:)]
