Getting very nervous now.

So it's 10 days now until I fly to the Dominican with my 2 best friends and I'm starting to get very very scared and uptight about it all :#

I've been a nervous flyer since I was about 6 or 7 and it's been getting worse ever since. I've never done a long haul flight before and the thought of being on edge for almost 10 hours is just starting to bug me.
I've done the VS fear of flying course to no avail and I know all the technical stuff and the statistics but still I'm terrifed I'm going to die in some awful way.
I've realised recently I have an anxiety problem and a problem with not being in control of things.
So, basically long story cut short I need some help and advice on how to get through it, I've had a quick look at other posts on here but I've tried most things, plus take-off for me's the worst and I can't use any electronic things then and even if I broke the rules and did I'd be terrified of missing hearing a wing snap off or something!! You'd think working at an airport would help but no ?|
Oh, I'm flying with Thomas Cook by the way.

Hi Liz, I can't really give you a magic receipe for overcoming your nervousness about flying. I've traveled a lot and tend to get anxious before a trip, which seems to get worse as i get older.

What I find helps me is to concentrate on the holiday and where I am going and how much fun I'm going to have when i get there. You'll have your friends with you and i'm sure that they will do all they can to help. Also i would suggest letting the flight attendants know that you are a nervous traveller. They will be used to passengers who aren't that good with flying.

Try and be positive about the adventure that your going on. a couple of suggestions:

1. Make sure your friends are aware of how your feeling, they'll do all the can.
2. organise some music for the flight, your favourtie songs etc, or a relaxing mix of music.
3. Take your favourite book(s) to read on the flight, once your airbourne, kick back and lose yourself in a good book.
4. Just think about how much of a great time you'll have once you get to your destination.

You've made a good start by booking your holiday and it can only get better.

Enjoy your trip and take everything in your stride, you cannot plan for every evenutality, but being prepared as much s possible will help.

have a great time

TL

Get some Tamazepam, take a light 'knock out' dose 30 minutes before take off looks likely to happen (top up carefully if delayed), drink moderately, and have your favourite magazine open in front of you (like Heat's torso of the week) - let you travel companions know!

I am not at all a pill popper, but sometimes, they really do have their purposes. I used to be the same, ennui has helped me overcome that, but in the early days I did take a drug or two to help me out. Like you it was all completely uncontrollable anxiety, I know how aircraft fly, all the bumps etc. and no shortage of knowledge (in fact, knowledge made it worse).

Oh, and I used to figure that there are 10,000 aeroplanes taking off about the same time as mine, and none are crashing, so mine won't either.

I've tried reading and music and stuff but I just can't relax.
Slinky can you get them over the counter or are they prescription only? I'm working pretty much right up to when I leave.

Lizz

Tamazepam are legally available on prescription only.

Paul

Get some Tamazepam....

I am not at all a pill popper, but sometimes, they really do have their purposes. I used to be the same, ennui has helped me overcome that, but in the early days I did take a drug or two to help me out.

Lizz I'm with slinky09 on this one. I too was a very nervous flyer, and on top of that I was like you a sufferer from anxiety attacks.

After popping a few pills, having a drink or 2 and holding a few hands I too got over my fears, not only of flying but of the fear of not being in control. Now I just luv flying and do not suffer from any form of anxiety. Actually now I just luv flying London to Sydney my favourite route, perverse I know.

I really do feel for you, Lizz but please persevere. Once you overcome it and believe me you can and will, your life will change beyond recognition.

Best of luck

Apple

Thankyou for the advice I'm thinking now I should make time to get to the docs and try and get some of these, they do sound like exactly what I need because I really can see myself sat there expecting the worst for the good part of an entire day :$

Yes Lizz get to the Docs - sooner you make an appointment the sooner you'll get sorted.

He may prescribe Temazapam or something else or he may not but there are alternatives.

Besides you've got a week or so with the girls in the sun to look forward too.

Plus you bought a travel plug - be a real shame not to get to use it

you could also try beta blockers, they slow the heart rate,reduce palps and make you feel more relaxed. mrs FB uses a mixture of BB, tamaz and red wine....and she is the worlds worst flyer (she even passed out once thr a panic attack)

you could also try and find a good hypno tape to listen to right up to the last minute

oh and PS the M25 is more dangerous !!

as the above comments suggest go and see your GP i work in the NHS and most Dr's would give you a prescription for something if you explain your situation to them.
from your post above i can see you have tried all other alternatives available. so your GP shouldn't have any problem helping you with this.

Chris

I have a hypnosis thing on my ipod that I got from the fear of flying course I did with Virgin a while ago, usually sends me to sleep but like I said, it's my first long haul flight so I'm not used to trying to calm myself down for more than about 3 hours.
Docs will have to wait for next week, back to work on Tuesday! I wish I could be as calm as the pilots I always see at work strolling along with a giant starbucks ready for what looks like an easy day at work!!
And I bought 2 travel plugs, they have to be used, not to mention I want some beachy pictures with my fancy camera!

Lizz

My first ever flight was LHR to SFO after 30 odd years avoiding flying. I was with friends who were seasoned travellers so this helped; plus my GP prescribed some 2mg diazepam - I took one when I arrived at the airport and another just before boarding

They definitely helped, in fact, so much that I loved the flight and the great service I received from VS

The following year, desperate to revisit the States, I booked a solo trip LHR - LAX , knowing that this would be "make or break" for my fear of flying.

Again, I took the same meds and it was a breeze (aided by the fact I was upgraded BA) from Business Class to First

Since then, I have flown Transatlantic every year (without meds) and absolutely love it

As others have said, try and concentrate on the wonderful experiences that will await you at the other end

Good luck

Hi Liz. Another long-term fearful flyer here! I flew to Boston with VS a few years back after doing the Virgin Flying Without Fear course. I had a bit of a wobble boarding the plane as I'd forgotten the size of a 747 (as it was then), but the flight crew were wonderful, and brought me and my other half champagne (we were in Economy!) to celebrate. What I found during the flight was that most of the time I felt fine, just a bit wobbly during take-off, turbulence and any banking. I found the flight back much easier, and upgraded to PE for the extra space & attention! I'm flying to Orlando with VS next year and feeling fine about that, so far. Good luck, I bet you'll be fine.

Hi Liz,

I would speak to the crew as well. Tell them you don't like flying and they will come and check to see if you are ok before the flight and during.


What part of flying do you not like?

Jo

Liz, something else you could try is Emotional Freedom Tecnique (EFT) If you google it, you'll find what it's all about. I've used in it the past when I'm somewhat anxious about travelling, and I find that it does help.

Thanks I'll have a look at that.

I would say I hate take-off the most, I hate heights as well so the thought of terra firma moving away very quickly is awful even when I sit on an aisle the sensation doesn't agree with me! Also get the feeling somethings going to go horribly wrong ending with me either being blown out the plane or plumeting to earth in some awful dive because somethings gone wrong. So unlikely I know and like I said I know all the statistics and technical stuff but I just can't shake the feeling off that I'm going to be the unlucky one on a flight where something happens

Hi Lizz

You won't come to a horrible end because you have to post detailed TRs for all of us who are willing you on!

Sometimes, having a few tablets with you from the Doc is enough. It's knowing that they are there should you need them, & then you'll feel so proud of yourself if you don't need them. If you do take them, well, that's what they are there for.

Anyway, you'll be too busy writing ALL the details down for all of us waiting with baited breath. If you focus on the details, you'll be so busy writing that you'll forget to be a tad nervous.

Go for it & have a wonderful holiday.

R P

As a passing GP I will just stick my oar in here!

GPs are a little reluctant in general to give out many of these as diazepam (valium) can be a drug of abuse and temazepam (a shorter acting version) is actually a controlled drug with some of the same requirements at diamorphine (heroin)

There are a couple of practical issues as well. You cannot drive at the far end after having any of these drugs (they make you drowsy) and there are occasional odd reactions where people get more agitated with them - it is probably a feeling of loss of control in a similar way to becoming agitated after alcohol. If you do get them try on a quiet day before you go!

Alcohol has many of the similar effects as the tablets above and can be used to good effect, particularly around take off although don't be so drunk they won't let you on the plane.

Beta blockers block the effect of adrenaline. They don't actually make you less worried but the physical effects (palpitations, sweating etc) tend to be less. As these physical symptoms often worsen the anxiety they can break the cycle.
They are however a no-no if you have asthma or anything similar.

There really is no magic cure I am afraid and most things have their side effects. I have prescribed in the past and probably will in the future but I always mention most of the above at the same time.

Best of luck.

Lizz, I feel for you, I'm not a nervous flyer, but I did feel anxious before my last flight.

I don't like heights either but for some reason flying doesn't seem to bother me.

My Mum is much like you, she is terrified of flying, but I managed to drag her all the way to Antigua for my wedding, but what made us laugh was she wouldn't fly PE as she didn't want to risk being upstairs, and being a few feet more off the ground than she already was

Try to concentrate on your destination and what a fab time you're have when you get there

I'm sorry doing the Virgin Flying Without Fear course didn't work for you. Did you get back in touch with them before you flew? I just wanted to say, for anyone who reads this thread, that I did the same course having not flown for 9 years (after years and years of terror while flying I simply gave up) and it worked brilliantly! I love flying now. So it does work for a lot of people... Whether it's panic, claustrophobia, how the plane flies - they cover it all. Clearly it didn't work so well for you but I hope that doesn't put other people off. I wonder how your flights went? By the way not sure I should chosen the Virgin tail but can't un-choose it.