Things you don't want to read on your on-board menu #1

'All beverages on this menu are non-alcoholic'...

Ah well, only a short hop, and to be fair to Qatar, they have just provided me with one of the hottest hot towel experiences ever. Definitely got the pores going...

I wouldn't be over bothered. Both myself and Mrs D have been known to say no thank you to a drink with the meal.
I'd be more worried if the menu said,
Egg and spam
Egg, bacon and spam
Egg, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam
Spam, sausage, spam, spam, spam, bacon, spam tomato and spam
Spam, spam, spam, egg and spam
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam

Dick D

I wouldn't be over bothered. Both myself and Mrs D have been known to say no thank you to a drink with the meal.
I'd be more worried if the menu said,
Egg and spam
Egg, bacon and spam
Egg, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, bacon, sausage and spam
Spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam
Spam, sausage, spam, spam, spam, bacon, spam tomato and spam
Spam, spam, spam, egg and spam
Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam

Dick D

Actually, the menu is parrot a la mort. To drink, a cup of cold tea. Without milk or sugar. Or tea.

Erm, "Pie with cherry tomatoes and gravy"

For me:

... with cheese
... with melted cheese
... with goats cheese (actually allergic to this one! Just can't eat other cheese 30k feet up in the air).

Oh dear, I take off, thinking that I've set the thread up nicely for a bit of Pythonesque banter, and what do I get on landing... a total diversion with those darned tomatoes again. Oh well...

Incidentally, I thought the disembarcation at Doha was hilarious. I was cursing under my breath at the fact we parked at a remote stand, but at least they let us business pax off first (ok they say it's 'first' but really that's dressing it up). So we get off, down the steps and see we have a bus of our own... ok, so far, so BA (on a good day).

That was, until I got on and discovered it was a bus specifically done out for us, with 12 armchair seats around the sides of the bus, carpet, gold trimmed tray tables etc... all that was missing was a chandelier.

Brought a smile to my lips anyway. Same as when I found where the Krug was hiding in this ridiculously cavernous lounge.

Edit, now I've located some very decent bordeaux... For anyone that likes their old world reds, the 2008 Ducru-Beaucaillou is very good, if perhaps still young. May give the 2009 Brane Cantenac a go next. My advice is to enjoy it while it lasts, no way can this be economically viable for business passengers...

Actually, the menu is parrot a la mort. To drink, a cup of cold tea. Without milk or sugar. Or tea.

Pah! I used to dream of drinking cold tea. I used to live in a ditch and crawl out it every morning, getting flogged by my dad within an inch of my life, just to have the privilege of watching the neighbours through their window drinking tea.


(Technically At Last The 1948 Show and not Python but commonly attributed)

A menu full of mushroom items..

A menu full of mushroom items..

Well as a matter of fact, there are Sweet and Sour mushrooms on tonight's menu out of JNB. Just in case that's your sort of thing...

[honey lamb]

On ex-USA flights,

Terrine of Roadkill
Ragout of Possum
Armadillo Stew.



And on the drinks menu:

Moonshine!

On ex-USA flights,

Terrine of Roadkill
Ragout of Possum
Armadillo Stew.



And on the drinks menu:

Moonshine!

One of the nicest meals I had was road kill.
My brother in law was following a vehicle that hit and killed a deer. Brother in law on his way to work at Heathrow for a large airline, picked up the carcass and took it in to work where the kitchens butchered it, marinated the meat in red wine and gave him back a substantial portion. It was delicious.
I don't believe any of it made it's way onto the aircraft.

Dick D